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Monday 3 January 2011

Nothing Like The First Time.

Like a mongoose transfixed by a cobra.

Be honest, the very first time you experienced it was like no other. Wait! I know where you're going. Get your mind out of the gutter. Can't you think of nothing else? I'm talking about your first catwalk show! You didn't think we were going there, did you? Gotcha!

Oh, before we go any further, allow me to please take this opportunity and welcome you all to a new year and my first post for 2011. We hope for nothing but success in whatever endeavors we get up to this year. Welcome. Now where was I?

My first time was like no other. After many a month of plotting and planning, it all came down to my abilities of charm and sheer shamelessnes that got me inside 'the promised land' - the British Fashion Council tent for John Rocha. At the time of said show, I was lurking outside like a feret who'd heard a rumour that there were big fat mice on the loose. Nothing was going to stop this cunning young man from getting inside that tent come hell or high water.

So, with all the charm of a coiled burmese python, I came peddling snake oil about how I'm an assistant to a very important photographer that had gone to fetch his rechargeable battery and wanted to give it to him inside because he couldn't come outside (oh, the lies we tell just to see a show...) All this verbal trickery coupled with creative theatrics finally paid off and I was let in!

Let me tell you, the atmosphere was electric, everybody was so fabulously dressed that I felt lost and small like the ugly duckling amongst white swans. This however did not put me off because I was on a mission - to get a front row seat.  

Now if you're reading this and you've never been to a catwalk show, the seating protocol is done with such finesse and excecution that I can only compare it to a special forces team sent on a mission to rescue hostages from a Somali pirate village. 

This meant that no matter which trick I could pull, there was no way I was going to seat on the front row. The politics of the front row can only be compared to the selection process of becoming the pope. It is so complex that I cannot get into it now. 

It was John Rocha that had the honour of taking my catwalk show virginity and I gotta tell you, my bodily functions can only best be described to a mongoose transfixed by a cobra. I was speechless and fell hopelessly in love with fashion shows ever since. I've been to many a catwalk show since then, but that show shall forever be etched in my brain. 

Oh, before I let you go, I gotta tell you where I watched it from. Click here...


For The Love Of Fashion And Other Things said...

I love the way you write. Very slick and witty! :)

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Coco said...

Lovely post. My first was BStore & Tim Soar on a menswear day. I think it took 3 days for my heart rate to return to normal, pure joy! x

Connie Staccato said...

This is fascinating! Like a prequel.

More, please! I'm being entertained and getting an education all at once. The perfect world!

The Photodiarist said...

Love this post! I documented my first (and only) time here:

And here:

daniela kate morosini said...

this made me smile :) i feel so bad for not having a proper first time story - i was in the 2nd row for my first show, that's what blogging does to you...xx

Fashionistable said...

I have to say I have always been impressed with how you swing this. Go David. Xxxx

jill said...

David, that's uncanny that you wrote this: I don't know if you saw (I don't expect you to) but back in Sept 2009 - my first LFW - on the last night a new friend from Paris told me about a catwalk show I had to see. She was very blase about getting into shows and until then I just assumed, I'm not in the business, I don't need to actually see the shows, just being outside watching & shooting people is interesting enough for me. It was KTZ and I did my post in the same vein - about the headiness of 'a girl's first time'.

But also: I was at that John Rocha show! Because I now have an access all areas photographers' pass, I don't technically need the invites (altho they're nice to get) but for this one, I ended up kneeling in the aisle of the front row center(my favourite shot to catch the movement) and literally kneeling at Hillary Alexander's hem!! (I'll find the post somewhere to link).

Oh one more thing: I saw DanieKate's comment and I don't think she meant 'that's what blogging will get you' - she meant blagging ; ) but hey: whatever works right?

Found the post:

(and by the way: I LOVED the John Rocha show. I'm glad he was your first ; )

Happy New Year.

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